putin / random musings / russian politics / snarkbait

The future of Russia (an Amazon augury)

I was browsing Amazon for books again and…oh my gosh!

regime split

Not one, but two online retailers selling Putin? There is only one logical reason for this: the regime has finally split – quite literally – in two. Within the next 48 hours, we will hear of the ascension of Sergei Ivanov to the Russian presidency via a palace coup. The remaining liberal members of government will form a coalition around Alexei Kudrin. Russia will then attempt to launch a full-scale invasion of the Baltic countries but the political instability caused by the change of power combined with economic recession will cause Russia to split into twenty different mini-states. We won’t have to worry about the Russian Threat after that – the former republics of Russia will be too busy bickering among themselves to challenge Western values.

Can I get that job with the Washington Post now?

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3 thoughts on “The future of Russia (an Amazon augury)

  1. “Can I get that job with the Washington Post now?”

    Not yet, J.T.! WaPo is the sacred grove of the Neocons and True Patriotic Americans, a shining Olympus embodying Everything That Is Wrong Right ™ of the modern age Punditocracy. You need to add more wailing and gnashing of teeth about the lot of the oppressed minorities and the urgent need to make for a preventive nuclear strike against Russia.

    You are lacking absolutely baseless, rabid and insane bloodthirstiness of a True Proponent of the Democracy and American Universal Values ™. Here, that’s what you must aspire to! Because, by Jingo, Ukraine will be either American or depopulated wasteland!

    Like

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